January 16

Persuasive – Bring Your Own Device

Dear Prosper School Council, 

 

My name is Reggie Rivers and I am a recent graduate of Prosper High School.I would like to share my opinion towards whether or not a Bring Your Own Device proposal should be mandatory or not. I personally believe that this proposal should be rejected because what supporters don’t understand is that, ultimately, technology will not have a large positive impact on students’ learning abilities. 

 

The first and foremost reason I believe that BYOD should not be implemented is that, being a recent high school graduate, I understand that students will only use their devices as a form of distraction. Nowadays, cell phones make teenagers impatient, urging their minds to find out whether or not someone responded to their texts, or even who posted what on social media. Lending them the opportunity to do such activities within a space where they should be learning instead, will be only be harmful, not beneficial. A recent study states that for teenagers, specifically students, technology is a form of addiction. This, as the study indicates, develops a ripple effect of many other issues such as the inability to have social skills and maintain concentration on complex tasks, as well as the harm technology is producing on students’ cognitive skills. All of these combined, outweigh the benefits of technology and stand as a significant risk when deciding to implement BYOD. On a survey asking adults for their opinions, a teacher by the name of Calim Gamon stresses that her job is to educate students, not to monitor what they are doing on their phones. This is a strong effect of students easily becoming distracted. Teachers will continually be worrying as to whether or not their students are paying attention and understanding what is being taught. Teachers should not have this weight on their shoulders simply because their students are allowed to be distracted by their devices due to the BYOD proposal.

 

Another reason I believe that BYOD should not be implemented into Prosper High School is due to increasing bullying concerns. Students bully one another and this is just a fact. Allowing them, however, the opportunity to bring their devices to school will only increase the chances of bullying leading students to feel anxious about their situations. As sad as it is, bullying through technology is easier for many students who choose to bully because technology acts as a mask that they can hide behind. They don’t have to worry about teachers witnessing their behaviour towards others. Bullying through technology is more than sending rude comments. Sadly I know multiple peers who have gotten threats as well. It comes in many forms on devices. In classrooms students take photos of others as well as their teachers and send them around for fun. Students judge one another solely based on who has which phone. Cyber-bullying is so dangerous and can scar students. It will only make their anxiety and stress levels increase if they are able to access such hurtful comments and threats during class time when the only thing they should have to focus on is their education and what they are learning. A police officer by the name of Maxwell Ponte stated that he worries that through allowing technology in the high school, stress and anxiety for students will steadily increase.

 

The third reason I do not support the idea of BYOD is due to the financial debt it will cause, starting with the parents of students. Cindy, a mother of children who attend Prosper High School, emphasizes on her struggle with spending money on bills and upgrades for her children’s devices. She simply cannot afford to continue paying for all these costs especially if they will increase by BYOD. Cindy is one parent out of many, however, numerous numbers of parents will struggle with the financial costs following the implementation of BYOD. On FastPoll, a student argues that he uses his phone only for emergencies and having to use it in class permanently, will not be possible for him. He will not be able to pay for the bills and this struggle will fall on him. I remember being in class, and witnessing a number of students who did not have their own devices at all. Will the school expect them to buy it for hundreds of dollars along with data and bills to pay for? At a larger perspective, the financial issues will fall upon the school as well. Devices will get lost or stolen, they are bound to eventually. How will the school take responsibility for this and to what extent are they willing to go to assist students from preventing such situations? The costs will increase as the school will have to implement tools to help them solve these issues. Rather than going through all this financial debt, devices should simply not be mandatory to bring to school.

I understand that the idea of students bringing their own devices sounds beneficial because our society is progressly relying on technology, however, the harms are too vast to be ignored and affect, not only the students, but also their parents and teachers. Lending students the free will of accessing their phones in class will distract them, lead to increased amounts of bullying and anxiety because of it, and will frustrate parents with keeping up with their children’s phone bills. I truly hope that my opinion on this matter will assist you with deciding whether or not to implement BYOD and I greatly appreciate you taking the time to read my letter. If you have any questions, feel free to call me on 403-123-456 or email me at Reggierivers@gmail.com.  

Sincerely,

Reggie Rivers

January 15

Lit Exploration: A River Runs Through It

How Experiences Can Change One’s Life

What is your opinion that an individual’s life can be altered by a particular experience?

 

Experiences drive individuals’ lives as they form specific opinions, beliefs, and values. All of these can either grow into beauty or shatter into one’s death. When we face a specific experience, it begins to alter the way we view the world and multiple aspects of it. This shift in beliefs and perspectives greatly impacts one’s life, changing it either for better or for worse. In the film A River Runs Through It, we are shown two opposing examples of this. Norman flips the page to a new chapter in his life through a specific experience while his brother, Paul is forced to shut his book altogether. Experiences, small or large, will impact our lives in some way because our perspectives are constantly altering and it only takes one particular experience to cause a drastic change in our lives. 

 

In the film A River Runs Through It, directed by Robert Redford, we are introduced to Norman, a boy who idolizes his father’s values and beliefs and grows up centered around them. A shift arises when Norman meets Jessie Burns at a dance. He tries to impress her by mentioning jazz however this rapidly becomes an awkward conversation. Viewers can tell that Norman is trying undoubtedly hard to impress Burns as he is very affectionate toward her. He continues to pursue her by asking her out the very next day and we see his feelings for her build up throughout the movie as he takes her brother fly-fishing and admits to not wanting to leave her when he gets an offer from the University of Chicago to be a professor. The particular experience, Norman meeting Burns, drastically changes Norman’s life as it begins to revolve around her. At the end of the movie, we see that they plan to move to Chicago together. If it weren’t for Burns, Norman might not have taken the job since he wanted to become a lumberjack instead of a professor. Even as he receives the offer letter, we see the humbleness in him and the hesitance when sharing this news with Burns, however, he does so right after she begins to cry. This shows the extent to Norman’s love for her and the fact that he wants to see her happy and will do anything to achieve this goal. Another way the experience of meeting and falling in love with Burns alters Norman’s life is by the shift in his beliefs and values. All throughout his childhood, Norman and his younger brother Paul were taught that fly-fishing is as sacred as religion and should be fundamental in their lives. Paul holds onto this into his adult life and this becomes his key value. Norman on the other hand, while still fly-fishing from time to time, creates a new value for himself, Burns, and her love. He sacrificed his goal of wanting to be a lumberjack for Jessie, and while Norman seemed upset at first, love had overtaken him after he witnessed how excited Burns was to start the next chapter of their lives together. This shows the commitment Norman has for their relationship and how Burns makes him feel content.

 

Experiences can alter your life for the better, however also for the worse. Paul understands the craft and technique of fly-fishing a lot more than anyone in the movie. Fly-fishing is the one value in his life that he respects and this is vastly portrayed in the scene when Norman watched his brother “create art.” For a moment, us viewers are led to believe that fly-fishing, his love, will save him, but alas it does not. The particular experience that drastically changes Paul’s life is the scene when him and Norman are at the bar. Norman watches as Paul walks over to a room of men that seem to be gambling. Paul whispers in one of the man’s ears and the mood suddenly diverts when around five men begin to shove him and push him out of the room. Norman gets startled and soon realizes that Paul is in debt due to the lifestyle he created for himself. Norman, then, offers his brother money but Paul refuses to take any of it. This

 experience unquestionably alters Paul’s life as it ultimately leads to his death. The first sign of this is when he is late for fishing with Norman and their father. Paul is never late for three things, “work, fishing, and church.” However, when he is late for fishing in a scene, even though he shows up, it foreshadows that his life is going to rotate upside down very soon. It does. Paul is said to have been beaten to death at the bar for all the debt that he was in and this showcases how even a small experience like Paul’s, when he got shoved out the door at the bar, can lead to the tragedy of one’s life.    

 

All my life I’ve wanted to be a writer. I remember sitting in my elementary class writing stories upon stories and convincing myself that I will become an author and will write hundreds of books. One experience recently occured that drastically changed my views and possibly my future life. I was invited to an open house at the University of Lethbridge and while deciding whether or not I should go, I began worrying about where I want to see myself twenty years from now. I finally chose to go and it definitely altered my life. I felt hopeless until I asked a volunteer where the library is. She said to me, “the library is the building next to this one and the Education library is two floors up.” I decided to give myself a tour of the libraries and while entering the Education library, my life started changing. I still remember walking in and being in complete awe of the books, and hundreds of sources that were placed for teachers. I walked around and saw hand puppets, children’s’ books and teachers’ guides. I walked over to the back of the library and glanced out the window. Beautiful hills were making there way to the sky that was laced with endless clouds of pure white. This was the moment I knew that I was meant to be a teacher. I opened multiple guides, adn textbook sources, and instantly fell in love with the art of teaching children and building the foundations of their brains. Ever since that day, I have been working harder than I ever have to reach my goal of going into the Education program at the University of Lethbridge and I am positive I will be able to grasp onto this dream and make it a reality.

 

Certain experiences can drastically alter your life and continually change your views, beliefs, and perspectives and many aspects. This was showcased in the film when Norman met and fell in love with Burns. He showed humbleness and commitment as his feelings grew into something real. It altered his life as he decided to become a professor and move to Chicago with her. Paul, on the other hand, ended up getting beaten to death due to the debt that he was drowning in. Through visiting the University of Lethbridge, my future suddenly became clear and I now know the path I will set foot on. Every experience changes some aspect of an individual’s belief, opinion, or values for better or for worse. 

January 15

Visual Response

Box Labeled “Lady-Like”

 

I distinctly remember the night I lost all faith in the universe. I distinctly remember the day I gained it all back. My name is Anne LeBlanc and I here is my story. 

 

I was born on a scorching afternoon in nineteen-fifty. My mother always described it as the most enlightening day of her life, my father only ever mentioned the blistering heat of mid-July. Growing up as a woman in the nineteen-hundreds had its flaws. I was always different. I didn’t want to wear dresses and have tea parties, I didn’t want to stay home and have my hours revolve around chores. My dream was to be different. I wanted to go to school and learn. I wanted to sit in a classroom and absorb all the material being taught by my teacher. I wanted to take a long drive with a blanket of stars surrounding me and get a tattoo on my arm. I wanted to feel the depth that freedom had to offer. My mind felt the desire to become something greater than myself, but that didn’t happen. 

 

My mother ran ill when I was a fourteen year old girl. Cancer. All the years of her life were condensed into two short months. I was never able to stir up one short word, goodbye. It took a toll on my life and I was never the same after that. 

 

My favourite memory of my mother was her urging me to behave as a lady should. “Anne straighten out your back, do not bend over like that, you look ridiculous.” or “Young lady, we have been through this at least a hundred times, you better sit with your legs crossed over, or do not sit at all.” This was our routine, my mother correcting my every movement and posture and me, well I did not know better than to rebel. I chose to ignore or when I wanted to have a bit of fun, I’d glance over at her, smile the widest smile, and laugh. My father always played along with me, “let her be a child for God’s sake.” Defeated, my mother would roll her eyes and walk away whispering to herself, “why do I even bother with this girl?” Laughter filled the room as my father grabbed onto my hands and we danced in the living room of our home.

 

This was my life, it was all I ever knew. I was what my mother had created of me and when she rose to the skies, I was lost. My father never spoke a word to anyone, let alone me. He remained in his study days after her death and I was left alone. 

 

This was the night I lost all faith in the universe, but mostly in myself. I distinctly remember that night as I held a tight grip on my mother’s hand. She leaned and whispered two short words, “be fearless.” If only I had listened to her soft voice once. 

 

The hallways echoed of her voice but she was not there. Each time I lumped into a seat, her voice would ring into my ears, correcting me. I had changed. With her gone, I obeyed for the first time. I had become the lady my mother always wanted of me. Dreams of going to school and getting an education no longer spurred inside my head and for the next couple of years, the memories associated with my mother were all repressed. The person who I once was, deteriorated into the abyss until I no longer had any desire but that of looking after the house and taking care of my father. 

 

 I knew though that a small ember continued to burn inside my chest. It never fully left. As the years dragged onto one another, I had begun to realize that there was no point in any of this. I was not my mother and there was nothing wrong with that. My mind felt the need to force myself into a box labeled “lady-like” and it was not for me. 

 

By the age of twenty-four, I set out on my own path. I was going to find the girl who had fluttered into the abyss and I was going to return her to her rightful owner. Society and its norms were never meant for me and I had begun to realize that it was alright. 

 

It was a heated afternoon in nineteen-seventy-five when I decided to receive my first tattoo. I sat in the stool of a small run-down store and my mother’s voice echoed in my head, “be fearless.” I never entirely understood what she meant until that day. She was the reason I felt brave. The tattoo was a photo of my mother. After that day I chose to express myself through the art of tattooing. I was a canvas that had been painted over a few times but all those times were through others’ lenses; my mother, society, until that day. I learnt to be a fierce woman and to alter the expectations that were forced upon me and billions of other girls and women.   

 

This was the day I gained my faith back in, not only society, but myself. I was braver than I had convinced myself.

 

After that, I took steps into my path and discovering my identity. I bought my first ever car with the money I had saved up in the summer of nineteen-seventy-one. It was a beige Volkswagen beetle that I cherish to this day. 

 

Ever since that day of getting my first ever tattoo, I  got many more of all the milestones in my life. They make me who I am and who I am is enough for me, even if it is not enough for society.   

January 15

Night Lit Exploration

The Strong Foundation of Beliefs

Night 

 

Every individual holds at least one core belief that they value to an extreme extent. If this value were to shift due to the influence of others’ actions, the way in which the individual perceives specific aspects in life can drastically change. Others’ actions toward you can either make the foundation of your beliefs stronger or can shatter it altogether. This is evident in the novel Night written by Elie Weisel. In this novel, Wiesel explores his hardship with having to face the horrific events of the halocaust. Near the beginning of the novel Elie forms his core belief, however, throughout the novel, that core belief is challenged due to the actions of individuals around him. The way in which others act toward individuals can alter and influence their beliefs either in a negative or positive way which results in the strengthening of one’s beliefs and values, or essentially, the shattering of one’s beliefs and values.

 

In the novel, Night, readers are introduced to a character named Moishe the Beadle. Elie’s attention is drawn to him due to the fact that he is very different from the individuals in Elie’s neighborhood. Moishe the Beadle is described as being a poor man who is very religious and humble. He prays often and his eccentric characteristics are what essentially draw Elie to Moishe the Beadle. In one part of the novel, readers find out the core belief that has been established within Elie through the influence of Moishe and his actions. Through the passion of his religion, Elie asks Moishe to be his mentor and to guide him to the true essence of his being. Elie feels the need to be closer to his God in a spiritual way and he believed that Moishe is the answer. Near that scene, Elie gets asked why he cries when he prays. He is bewildered and begins questioning why his faith is so strong. He replies by comparing his love for his religion with breathing. This shows that retaining Elie’s faith is a core belief for him and he realizes this through the actions and advice from Moishe the Beadle. As Moishe teaches him about the beauty in God and faith, Moishe mentions to Elie that if he confines his existence in searching for answers to his questions, then those questions will lose their power. Elie, from that point on, decides to live by this and gain trust in his God as well as in his faith. This statement displays the establishment of Elie’s faith and the extent to Mosihe’s influence on Elie’s beliefs and what he holds true to himself. When individuals are moved and inspired by the actions of people around them, their beliefs are influenced and strengthened, even when they don’t realize it at the time. 

 

While beliefs can be established through the influence of others, they can also shatter. This is evident in the novel Night when Elie first experiences the horrific and inhumane actions of the soldiers and guards. When he arrives at the first camp and gets separated from his mother and sisters, Elie witnesses babies being thrown into a chimney. From this point, till the end of the book, Elie’s beliefs in his faith deteriorate as he questions how his God is allowing these gruesome acts to take place. He is silenced as his father gets beaten up in front of him by a soldier and finds himself filled with guilt afterward. Near this part in the novel, Elie questions his core belief and wonders if there is a God at all. This is essential due to the fact that at the beginning of the novel, Elie’s beliefs were so strongly established. As the actions of the soldiers and guards grow more violent, Elie’s beliefs are negatively influenced to a higher extent. He watches an innocent child suffer for half an hour hanging from the rope of the gallow and mentions that that night, the soup tasted of corpses. This statement that Elie mentions can have multiple meanings, however, when viewing it from the perspective of his faith and beliefs, the soup can symbolize both. At this point in the novel, Elie’s beliefs have been permanently damaged and shattered due to all the gruesome actions he witnessed by the soldiers and guards, but also by the inaction from his God. Through the actions of others, one’s beliefs can be stripped from them until they hold a strong belief against their initial one. 

 

When I was in grade seven, I remember a time when my beliefs were greatly influenced by the actions of my peers. Until that day, I held a strong belief that every individual was as kind as they could be, I always saw the best in people. This was around the time I began wearing a headscarf and I began losing many friends. I didn’t understand it at all. It started small, in classrooms I would sit alone as my friends moved to other tables. Then, it began impacting me a lot when no one would want to spend time with me at all anymore. I walked into class one day and sat in the corner. I opened my book, For One More Day by Mitch Albom, and began reading. As I scanned every word in all the pages, a saw a slip of paper being passed to me from a boy in my class. I asked him what it was but he giggled and ran to the other side of the classroom. I opened the small piece of paper and read the horrifying words that were engraved on it: “you’re ugly and that’s why no one likes you.” I was bewildered. I read over the words again and again trying to make sense of what I was feeling. My hands began to shake and from the corner of my eyes, I could see hundreds of eyes glaring into my soul. I heard laughter coming from every corner of the classroom and I didn’t know better than to run. The action of my classmates, writing this awful note, handing it to me, and laughing at my face, drastically changed my belief. Some people were not kind at all, and it wasn’t always beneficial to see the best in them. What I didn’t realize at the time was that, while they were glaring at me and laughing at my imperfections, they couldn’t see the light that I held inside my soul. Through this experience and the actions of my peers, I have learned to never judge a book by its cover. Every individual is beautiful. That beauty, isn’t always on the outside. 

 

It can be a miracle when an individual’s actions influence your beliefs for the better. Moishe the Beadle did exactly that fro Elie. He taught him the true meaning of his faith and helped establish Elie’s core belief, the belief that faith is the most essential value one can hold. The actions others have toward an individual, however, can also impact their beliefs in the most negative way possible. Elie’s beliefs about his faith rose and shattered through the actions of the guards around him. They influenced his beliefs so much, that at the end of the novel, he held the complete opposite belief as he did in the beginning of the novel. He no longer believed in his faith. He questioned his God as to why he let such cruelty take place, and when it continued, Elie’s rejected his faith altogether, hence rejecting his core beliefs. While our beliefs are built on the foundation of personal experiences, others actions greatly influence them to either continue growing or ultimately break apart. 

December 16

Never Shall I Forget ~ Option C

 

Never shall I forget the day every string of courage was stolen from my soul. 

Never shall I forget the moment every last thread of confidence was torn out of my chest,

 

never.

 

Never shall I forget the fright I felt as hundreds of eyes glared at me.

Never shall I forget the rhythm of each and every heartbeat.

Never shall I forget the trembling of my legs, the tortue in my gut, or the damage I felt inside my head,

 

never. 

 

For this was the day I watched the girl I was deteriorate 

into the abyss.

 

And even now, as I stand still with all that I am,

my soul cannot help but wonder whether small pieces of who I once was have been left behind.

 

Never shall I forget,

 

never. 

 

It was a day like any other. My twelve year old self walked into the school building and toward the library.

I sat down, surrounded by every person in my grade, along with all my teachers.

Our heads glanced over to the front of the room as a video began to play.

 

Never shall I forget this day,

 

the day I felt betrayed by the people around me,

the day the beginning of my safety’s end had risen.

 

I stared into the pitch black screen when suddenly the Twin Towers appeared. 

 

Supercuts began rolling of planes, and smoke, and children crying in their mothers’ arms,

supercuts of ambulances, countless fire trucks, and police cars as planes crashed into the buildings.

 

I understood the video was describing the horrific event of 9/11.

 

Never shall I forget the day we watched this video,

 

because what I didn’t realize was that my peers held a completely different opinion on it than I.

 

They all turned and gazed into me with skepticism forming upon their faces.

I was bewildered, confused out of my mind. I didn’t understand why all their fingers pointed toward me.

And even though I know they didn’t mean to make me feel caged up, I still did.

I still felt like an animal at a zoo that everyone used for their entertainment.

I didn’t have a clue. Not a single clue why I was to be the scapegoat, why my people. 

 

Being a Muslim never meant fear until that day.

 

Never shall I forget it.

 

Never shall I forget the day I lost faith in the people around me,

 

never.

 

November 2

Visual Response ~ Maira

The Hope in Innocence 

 

Hope is more powerful than any storm of struggle. Stay afloat and you will see that not even the sky is a limit. This is what my mother had told me ever since I was young. I can still picture my first day of school distinctly because that was the happiest I’d ever been. 

I live in the Philippines in a small village with my brother, sister, and mother. My father passed away a month after by birth because he had caught a virus that ate away through his organs. I am the youngest, five years old. My brother is ten and my sister is eight. Every morning I watch them swing their backpacks over their shoulders, throw on their shoes, and run out of the house. I never see them board their bus since it arrives just around the corner. That is when my mother calls to me. When they leave for school, I help my mother collect water from the river two villages away. One morning I asked her, “Mother, how come we walk all the way here when there is a river just outside our home?”

As she looked down at me, tears began to form near the bottom of her mud brown eyes. Turning her head away she whispered, “Well that wouldn’t be any fun, now would it? This way, both you and I get a little stroll every morning.”

She smiled the most painful smile and kissed my forehead. Years later I found out that the river near our home had become polluted so much that the water was no longer drinkable. Our neighbor had become ill and died within two days.

As a boy, I always asked questions that I knew had complicated answers and my heart would feel the urge to solve every little problem. Even now, I still believe this is the reason my mother put me in school, to get an education and solve the puzzles with pieces I had collected over the years. I held tightly onto my brother’s hand, brushed my fingers through my hair, and gazed into my mother’s eyes. “This is it,” I thought. “My first day of school.” 

As I stepped out into the cloudy morning, I noticed that my mother was walking a few steps behind us. She had never taken my brother and sister to school before and I guessed this was to celebrate my first day. We walked alongside the river and this was the first time I observed it. Small ripples of brown made their way toward us, it looked like the night sky with all the stars twinkling at their own rhythm. Only this was not a sky and the little specks that danced inside the water were not stars. 

Suddenly, my brother halted to a stop and looked from me to my mother. She, ever so gently, kneeled down beside me and took a deep breath. 

“Do you want to have an adventure?” She asked, with the same smile from the other day, a little torn near the edges. I nodded my head and she pointed toward the river. I scanned the horizon, tall trees of green and turned my head slightly downward. In front of us was a black, rubber object that bounced slowly in the water. Confusion had overtaken me until I saw my brother climb onto it. My sister followed as they both reached out their arms. That is when I realized that this is how they get to school, by crossing the river on this object, every morning. I turned to my mother for an explanation but she seemed to know exactly what was spiraling in my mind. 

She leaned closer to me and whispered, “Hope is more powerful than any storm of a struggle. Stay afloat and you will see that not even the sky is a limit.” 

I understood right away and kissed her on the cheek before she could herself. She gave me a warm, comforting hug and I reached for my siblings. As I sat on top of this object, my brother told me to grasp onto it tightly and pedal with my feet. I gazed into the green water as the sunshine reflected in every curvature of every tide. It looked like jewels of hope making their way to the surface. I smiled at my brother and sister as they smiled back. Soon after I realized that all three of us were laughing and kicking the water high up as innocence swam around our bodies.  

Mother was right, every morning of crossing the river and fighting to get to the other side, it was its own adventure. As for hope, it beats in my chest and lives as a spark in my soul. I may not have lived the most fortunate life, but for me it was enough.

September 27

I Believe in Being Lost

https://www.pickpik.com/conifers-dark-fir-trees-fog-foggy-forest-4923

 

I believe in not knowing.

I believe in wandering without a compass in hand.

I believe in being lost. 

 

Only when you are lost, will you find what you have been searching for. Even while not knowing it there has been discomfort resting in the back of your mind, waiting for you to accept the truth, and be discovering who you truly are after the search. Search like the world was made for you to be lost in its beauty, in the beauty of the unknown. I believe in going along with the flow of whatever is meant to be, flirting with fields of possibility. Even when the world is fast asleep, dreaming in another life after a long, busy day of building ladders to reach threads of goals, I stay awake daydreaming of vast seas and oceans. In my nightlife, I sit patiently waiting and wondering. I am gloriously lost. And lost is exactly the way I want to be. As lost as a dandelion seed in the light of a wakeful spring breeze. I allow the subtle whispers of kismet to steer me in any direction. Disguised as a cool wind, they carry me along to where I know I belong.

 

It spills like a story. My story. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted my life to become. Whispers of the future filled the air around me, sending my lungs a feeling of suffocation. The future was a concept my mind was able to comprehend. But my future, it was a thought so near but a reality I could not seem to begin grasping onto. They asked what we wanted to become when we grew up and the truth is I never knew. I felt lost as the walls of questions kept closing in on me. The answer was always in the back of my head but I continued to ignore the fact that there were ever questions. So there I was, in the middle of a cold winter night. I reached for the compass and held it in my hands, something so fragile yet powerful. I had found my answer: writing.

 

I can still picture myself holding onto the thin piece of paper, it was blank. Clutching the pencil in my fingers and taking a deep breath, allowed something beautiful to happen. All the thoughts that had compiled themselves in my head began spilling onto the page, I had gotten a glimpse of what had been inside my soul for years for the very first time and at that exact moment, my future was set in motion. This was the moment I fell in love with writing. My mind was lost in a world of terror and tears. Only when writing had grasped onto my hand, did I realize the beauty of wandering helplessly. 

 

The following morning I rushed down the hallway of my school and into my teacher’s classroom. Ms.Skunta was the exact opposite of the stereotype of an elementary teacher. For one, I never saw a blinding-red apple sitting on her desk, symbolizing everything she was to her students. She wore monotone colours, grey, black, a washed out blue once in awhile. The only time I could catch a glimpse of her smile was when she would converse with other teachers just outside the classroom. Ms. Skunk. That was the nickname given to her. It’s not that she hated children or her job, I hope, it was as if a spark that had once fluttered in her eyes had withered away. I never understood it but as I got older and looked back to my elementary days, the pieces would bind closer together and begin to make sense. This is why I was terrified and excited all at the same time to show her what I had discovered about myself. 

 

I took a deep breath and handed her the thin paper, gazing into her eyes. She read over it and smiled. Smiled! Neither one of us spoke but she began to walk towards her desk and I followed. Sitting across from her my eyes peered into every item that sat still. Piles of paper, a granola bar, her laptop, and something I had to stare into for more than a few seconds to comprehend: a photograph of her kissing a man on the cheek. He looked about her age, with a faded beard, a red hat, and a smile as bright as the sun on a humid summer morning. As my eyes turned to meet hers, I could see a spark tucked just behind the walls of her mind. She grabbed onto a red pen and spoke. 

 

“Investigate is spelled with an ‘e’ not an ‘a.’ ” 

https://www.stocksy.com/276719/stack-of-notebooks-on-a-office

And this is when it truly began. So many stories were written about clues, birds, castles, and ice cream. Each one Ms.Skunta patiently edited with me, silently suffering through every butchered word. Writing had made my heart its permanent home and I will be forever grateful. This was eight years ago when I was a little girl. I was lost and lost is exactly the way I wanted to be. If I hadn’t been, my heart wouldn’t burst onto pages and pages of art every time I silently sat and began writing my mind. Forced to follow my path and no one else’s, I took my chance to become something greater than myself. Writing will always be a part of me and it will be the key element in who I may become in the future. For now, the walls are no longer closing in on me and my lungs are finally breathing in oxygen one breath at a time. In a way, I am lost right now. Only this time, with a journal and pen in hand. 

I believe in being lost because only when you are lost will you be found.