January 14

The Power of Experience

https://www.google.ca/search?q=family+over+everything&rlz=1C1GCEA_enCA787CA787&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjtg7-61r7dAhUH-J8KHUDGABwQ_AUIDigB&biw=1920&bih=974#imgrc=jd5F9xLJYIK7YM:

Experiences have the ability to make or break someone; many of them shape who we are as individuals. When we go through something often we carry the lessons from it. It is the bad experiences that we remember and learn from, the experiences that bring great adversity within our lives. In A River Runs Through It, written by Norman Maclean, we are introduced to the Maclean boys Paul and Norman who as they grow up face many adversities but deal with them differently leading to a tragic ending to their story. Even though experiences have the ability to alter someone’s life it is how the individual deals with it that truly alters who they are.

 

In A River Runs Through It by Norman Maclean it can be seen that throughout his life Paul Maclean is always seen as someone who made and followed their own rules but as he grows older he becomes darker getting involved with drinking and gambling at Lolo’s leaving those around him worried. Norman offers to help but his help is refused by his brother after he reveals his truth and his darkness to Norman. This experience with his brother left Norman feeling like he had failed to fill his role as the “brother’s keeper” though Paul is an adult and has the capability to deal with the consequences that come with his decisions. In the beginning of the film Norman says “My father once said to me Norman you like to write… Maybe one day you can write our story and only then you will understand what happened.” Norman like much of his family

ignored many of the problems that followed his brother Paul only quietly fearing what would happen to his brother. Not understanding what had happened to his brother Norman is left with the constant feelings of shame and guilt that he was not able to save his brother from his own demise.

 

After Paul’s death the Maclean family became more distant rarely ever talking about what had happened to Paul. When reverend Maclean and his wife are sitting in the kitchen at the table eating but not looking at each other, it is clear to the audience that Paul had been the glue of the family and having loss him they had lost a way to talk and connect with each other. Much like Paul his parents had a difficult time connecting and talking about the problems that come with losing a child especially one like Paul who often entertained and brought conversation to the dinner table that had been silent so many nights he hadn’t been there. Leaving a feeling of emptiness within the family.  Often families are brought together by loss and not torn apart, throughout the movie it is shown that the MacLean’s rarely ever address any problems pushing them to the side which could be seen as the driving force behind Paul’s death. This experience brought a

feeling of defeat within reverend Maclean who had been a man who walked proudly of who he was but now was hunched over by the time he had delivered one of his last sermons where he said “But we can still love them. We can love them completely without complete understanding” showing that though he does not understand his son he had come to terms with his death and loved him unconditionally.

There have been many experiences that have permanently altered my life. From the age of five to thirteen I had been bullied throughout all the schools I went to. It was like no matter where I went I wasn’t able to escape the demons that enjoyed torturing me. The feeling of being in a situation where your feel alone and like no one understands you makes your push into isolate yourself in fear of vulnerability. Opening up became a big fear of mine leading me to have constant anxiety and letting others take away my happiness. These very experiences helped me become who I am today. For many years I tried to run away from it until I hit a brick wall and had to fight back and find me. Building up my core values and showing that I am strong and capable but most importantly I have the power of being resilient. Like the MacLean’s I come from a culture where we push things under the rug: if it’s never mentioned it’s not a problem. The lack of understanding is often defeating but it is the unconditional love that I am given that keeps me going and pushing me into the right direction.

 

How an individual reacts to experiences alters who they are. It allows them an opportunity for growth and learning if not taken it can lead to a tragic ending like that of Paul Maclean. In A River Runs Through It, written by Norman Maclean the audience is shown through Normans actions with his brother along with the lasting effect Paul’s death had on the family that negative experiences have the power to make or break you. The repercussions of the experience shape who you are and the individual you will eventually become.

December 2

My Forbidden Fruit

By Anna Tecson

I am who I am.

I am the daughter of my mother and father. 

I come through them. 

And though I am with them, I do not belong to them. 

I am the daughter of God.

I have my own thoughts, body, and soul. 

I have no other desire but to find Him. 

But if my love and must needs have desires,

Let these be my desires:

To bleed willingly and joyfully,

that I may find peace in love’s ecstasy.

And to give thanks for another day of loving.

To then sleep with a prayer for my beloved. 

You would know my secret.

But how shall you find it unless you seek it in my heart?

In the depth of my hopes and desires lies my silent knowledge of love;

like seeds dreaming of spring beneath the soil my heart dreams of devotion. 

My fear of love

is but the trembling hand of the loved when she stands

before her lover whose hand is to web upon hers in affection.

 I have this terrible urge to be reckless and I’m dreadfully tired of holding back.

I know climbing forbidden fences is wrong,

so I’ll stick to falling in love with the wrong people.

 

I chose to write an emulated piece inspired by a series of poems: “On Children”, “Let these be your desires” and “On Death” by Khalil Gibran as well as the visual above, A Huguenot on St. Bartholomew’s Day. The visual depicts a pair of young lovers; the girl a Catholic is attempting to get her beloved, who is a Protestant to wear the white armband declaring allegiance to the Roman Catholics. The young man is seen pulling the cloth off firmly at the same time as he gently embraces his lover, and stares into her pleading eyes. The incident refers to the St, Bartholomew’s Day Massacre on August 24, 1572, when a plethora of French Protestants were murdered in Paris. The poem and the painting embodies the struggle I bear between my love for God and my love for another.

Sometimes, love for God is greater than love for another. All religions have a dogma that followers must accept without question. There is an insidiousness of dogma, however, and this affects our ability to be happy. The reason why you can’t do something without anyone telling you why is aggravating in itself. Anything can be ruined for somebody if they have had bad experiences with it. Mine was love. See, the one I love is much like me. They love me. And they want to be with me. But we are not allowed to be together. God created these two perfect beings and put them together and we chose imperfectly. We have to decide whether our love is worth not having our families involved in our lives, or if our religious differences and spirituality are worth not having love. It’s a Romeo and Juliet situation, without the happy ending. Without the families witnessing love destroying love. Without the approval from the families. It’s this love that evokes forbidden love and throughout evolution, what is forbidden has always been attractive. After all, isn’t it human nature and the nature of temptation to find the fun in rebelling? Why do we as humans find love that is nearly impossible more romantic than “easy” love? Because when people love through whatever odds, that’s romantic. That’s true love. 

I am loyal to Him, though I desperately want to love. Much like the Protestant in the painting, the fruit is tempting, in the end, what will you get? 

Religion can bring together masses of people who believe in God-but it can destroy a love that is amazing. This love isn’t perfect because we aren’t perfect. It is a pendulum that is swinging back and forth between my God and my desires, ultimately leaving me lost in my sense of identity.  Continue reading

October 30

Swimming

 

 

Well, it isn’t that easy for me to answer that. All I can really say is that it is almost everything to me and who I am. I grew up on music, listening to it as much as I can. Since I have parents from the 60’s it was all about Led Zeppelin, Rush, and Bob Segar. At that time I just listened to it because it made me feel good and enjoyed the sounds it created. The older I got the more I discovered my own taste of music and I found to literally enjoy every genre except country. There is just something about it that just makes me stay away from it. When I hit 12 years old, my brother introduced to my first rap song. It was called Donald Trump by Mac Miller, since that day I haven’t stopped listening to either rap or Mac. The older I got, the more I understood his music and paid close attention to his lyrics. This is a big reason to who I am today, I listened to what he would have to say in his songs and I would apply that in my real life. He was a huge influence on what I’m doing today and why I do it. He always believed in the fact that everyone needs to follow their dreams and do what they believe is right. People will listen to his lyrics and I can’t lie, he is similar to many other rappers but he somehow manages to create a really sincere underlying message. On August 3rd, 2018, he came out with one of my favourite albums he’s made, Swimming. He brought out his more sensitive side and talked about the troubles of being rich and famous. The more I listened to it the more I sympathized for him and made me want to help others around me. Unfortunately, a month and 4 days after the release of his album, Mac Miller died of an apparent overdose, committing suicide. If you listened to Mac regularly you knew of his problems and what he did to “fix” them. He was a troubled man, with a vice that killed him. Since his death, I have done nothing but talked to all of my friends and family around me. I made a promise within myself that want to continue to spread Mac Miller’s vision and help those who surround me. Now that I’m in Grade 12, it’s been hard to catch up with people but I’ve managed to grow closer and talk more often with the people I care about most. This is for you Mac, hope you found your wings.

October 29

My Beloved Keeper

Write about someone who you love and take responsibility for / or someone who feels that for you (i.e. a sibling/friend/etc…)

“Sweet, crazy conversations full of half sentences, daydreams and misunderstandings more thrilling than understanding could ever be.”

– Toni Morrison

Dear Keeper,

 

Would it not be so fortunate to know that there is always someone behind you who will stick by your side and never leave you, like how the letter Q does with U? Someone who will find the time in their hectic lives, ignoring the fact where they are at the physical moment and  just come beside you so you could lay your heavy head against their shoulders?

Just knowing that someone is always there for me, no matter what I may be going through or whom I may have grown into, is undoubtedly a blessing. A blessing that understands me, holds me secure from any danger including conflicts, toxic influences, and is just there for me in times of need.

This blessing is you.

You are like my shadow who follows me everywhere I go, not leaving me alone in the unknown world; you are present at every step of my life and at every decision of my life. Even though the sun may not be seen at times, this shadow of yours will always remain by me; your presence will always be felt until I breathe for the last time.  

From giving advice’s when I am utterly confused, to comforting me when I need it the most, you have done it all. You have done things that no one else will, with the exception of my parents. I am fortunate to know that you will always have my back, that you will never stop believing in me and understanding me.

I still remember the time when you and I had ran away from the house, not because we were immature teens, but because we were adventurous toddlers. I was narrated this incident in detail as I did not have a strong memory at that time, especially when I was only three. I had been told how everyone was unaware of where we went, which caused endless phone calls being made to my father. Both of my parents were so worried for both of us, and who knows what may have been circling through their minds. My father reassured my mother knowing that nothing could harm us, even though there were possibilities of a tragedy. Something about the connection that I may share with my father spoke to him and told him where we may be. The very first place he told my mother to check after searching every corner of the house was no other, but the playground.

What my mother told me of what she saw when she reached the playground spoke to my heart. It touched my soul. There in the distance was you, my sister, my elder sister,  standing right beside me. Your comforting hand enclosed with mine, our palms pressed together gave me a sense of security. Although you were only four, you safely took me to the playground that was near our house as our mother had forgotten that day. Every day our mother would take us to the park so that we could enjoy the wonders of the world; except that one day she forgot, and you were the one who fulfilled that responsibility towards me. You were the one who showed me a replication of my mother, someone who could be my second mother, someone who could shower me with the same affection and someone whom I could look up to.

My keeper was indeed my sister.

On gloomy days, when my world is being torn into pieces, seeming as if I am breaking apart, you have come to me. You have caressed my head and with each stroke, I have felt calmer and less vulnerable. I felt as though my world may become whole again, felt as though my sister will actually correct everything. In fact, you have hands of an angel, a mind so clear, and a heart so pure. With your comforting hands, you have sewn the interminable pieces of my heart back together. My heart may not have been returned to its original with no signs of grief and sorrow, but it has left a mark of you. A mark that will remind me that my sister will do her possible best in bringing a smile to my face. A mark that shows your existence at every step of my life, telling me that you will support me and never leave me alone. 

From the time I was young and up until now, you and I have cried together, laughed together, caused trouble together; we have grown up together. If there was no you, there would not have been I, and if there was no I, there would not have been you. Something would have been incomplete, a sense of emptiness, if one of us were not there. It would just not be normal without you.

I cannot imagine my life without you, because without you, there is no question of my existence. Without you, who am I? The confidence I have right now is because of you, the strength I have developed to face all my worries is because of you, the responsibility that I show towards our younger brother is because of you, and the love I show towards you is because of you. You have done such selfless acts towards me which have compelled me to love you. My love for you is indescribable.  

Thank you, my beloved sister. Thank you for being my keeper.

Sincerely,

Your one and only sister.

Image

October 29

Love Lies in the Eye of the Beholder

“We Can Love Completely What We Can Not Completely Understand”

http://www.yourdictionary.com/difference

Differences. They are what make us unique from one another. 

The ideologies and beliefs that we stand by can create problems between people, but they can also bring individuals together. The truth is, we strive to find people who are similar to us so we can feel a connection through acceptance and respect.

This quote originates from the movie, “A River Runs Through It.” It was aimed towards Paul MacLean, the divergent one of the family. Even as a child, we could see that he was much different than his father and brother through his carefree nature and the recklessness of his actions. He had an idealistic mindset which contrasted to his father and brother whom were more realistic and accountable. Because of these significant differences, Paul became distant with his family, leaving him to believe he could not count on his family to help him when problems arose. Even through the barrier that Paul put between his family and himself, Norman and Mr. MacLean loved Paul and tried to support him as much as they could. The two of them did not fully understand Paul, even after he died, but nevertheless, they gave him love, even when he did things that were deemed unlovable. The MacLean family had strong beliefs on a variety of topics, and although Paul did not always agree with his family, they still loved him without fully understanding him.

“They gave him love, even when he did things that were deemed unlovable”

I can relate to this quote through my own personal experience. My parents have different beliefs than me when it comes to school. They believe that I should aim for a career in teaching instead of law, which is what I want to do. The reasoning behind this is that they believe that I would succeed in that field rather than in a legal career. They believe they know what is best for me. My parents and I have argued about this topic because to me, it does not make sense. If they had a valid reason to prevent me from doing what I desire, then perhaps I would abide by their wishes. We have reached a common ground through this, which I believe makes us all happy, which is deciding on a different major in University. I would like to do psychology. With a bachelors in psychology, I can achieve a career as a psychologist, or I could further my studies and go to law school, which is a decision to be made later on. I know that my parents do not understand why I believe in the career path I want so strongly, and I do not understand them either. What I do know, is that even through our differences, they are solely thinking of what is beneficial to me, even if I don’t always agree with them.

 

It is possible to love someone through the differences that you share. This is evident through the relationship between the MacLean family in the movie, “A River Runs Through It.” I have also experienced this ideology firsthand through the differences that my parents and I share.

Change is inevitable.

People do not have to be the same in order to love each other, if that were to be true, then the world would not be full of unique individuals as it is today. In order to truly love someone, you must look past their flaws, and the disagreements you may share. This is when we can love completely what we cannot completely understand.

October 29

Personal Relationship in my Life

We all have those people in our lives. That always do that extra step for us, it could be a family member, a girlfriend, a boyfriend or even a best friend.Whoever it is, often times we never ask why they always take that extra step for us, but sometimes we also forget to thank that person. For me it’s been my mom. My mom has been there for my brothers, my cousins, myself. Every step, every way. She loves all of us, she’s done everything and anything to to ensure that our lives would be better. She taught me so many things about life, things I remember every day. She showed us all what it takes to be a hero.

“Life doesn’t come with a manual, it comes with a mother”

The relationship I have with my mother is very important to me. Sometimes we might fight and argue but at the end of the day we still love each other and have each other’s backs. The affection and care she has shown me all my life is immense. The skills I gained from watching and listening to her are endless. The things she taught me are crucial to my everyday life. Every time I talk to someone I remember the manners and politeness she taught me to use from when I was a kid. I remember the times in elementary where I didn’t want to go to school because the older kids would always push me around and bully my friends. My mom told me to be strong mentally although I easily could’ve been the smallest kid at school. However, this type of strength changed my life. I am now able to perform under pressure. I can go through unbelievable amounts of training through my Muay-Thai, boxing, and all around athletic desires. I would’ve never been able to do these things with the confidence I have today if it wasn’t for my mothers belief in me. The lessons she’s taught me for life, that I will pass onto my children someday. I will never forget the way she showed me to face my adversities and not run from them when times get hard.

The bond and influence my mother has had on my life is very crucial to the way I live in the sense that my values and beliefs are shaped around what she has taught me, and continues teaching me about life. I hope someday I can repay her with the joy and happiness she deserves. I am eternally grateful. We all have these people in our lives and we may not realize, however, they will always be there for you. They will always support you and do things to ensure your happiness. Pay it back to them as well. They deserve the utmost respect and gratitude for everything they do for you.

September 18

Just Be Kind

Kindness

Kindness is the caring, loving, huggable parts of ourselves that some choose to hide because we have grown up in a society where we feel the most comfort in thinking the worst of everything. We surround ourselves in this tight bubble, being ignorant to the rest of the world. So when some are shown kindness, it’s like popping their bubble of comfort, making them panic and act out in anger. This is confusion. We all grew up knowing that nothing is free. So why would something like kindness be?

If you have to choose between being kind & being right, always choose being kind, and you will always be right.

Remembering my favorite story when I was a kid, Cinderella, I learned that only the strong can stay kind in cruel situations. It really inspired me to treat everyone with the same amount of respect, and to not judge others, and just be kind; but over the years, society has had its effects on me, and I started to forget Cinderella. I started to judge others and myself due to everyone standards, but the one moment when I realized that I needed to get back on track was the day I was meeting Sarah at the mall. I walked through the doors, trying to find her. I spot her by the escalator talking to someone. I walk closer, realizing that she’s talking to a man, and judging from his clothing he was homeless. That really struck me because she was having an actual conversation with him and I knew that if it was me, I would have kept walking. I saw how happy the man looked to interact with someone, and just be treated as a human being rather than a label. That day, I really reflected on myself, remembering my favorite fairytale, and how Sarah was my Cinderella that day.

So to answer the question of why kindness is free is because it comes from our hearts. Its something everyone needs, so, therefore, it should be free. And I started to notice how such a small thing can really impact someone’s day because it has for me. And so I try to change others. Kindness is like seeds. You spread them everywhere till it grows roots, and blooms into trees, and making more seeds, creating a cycle. So have the courage and be kind

Masha Malikova

https://www.pinterest.ca/pin/361906520040895203/

 

September 17

This I Believe; Family

Family 

I believe in family. I believe that the people you call family are the most loving and caring people you will ever encounter in your life. They are with you from the day you were born to the present day and will always be by your side. From day one, you feel a sense of belonging when around these people which can lead to a healthy relationship in the future. You will build a strong connection with those who you call family which can lead you to have more trust between each other. When a person goes through a hard time in their life, they usually rely on their families and loved ones for love and support that they’ll need to overcome an obstacle. Your family fulfills all your needs and provide you with all the things you need to live to the best of your ability. A family’s love is the best type of love an individual can receive because of all the love they show to one another and how that reflects how on  happy an individual can be in their daily lives. Unfortunately, some people are less fortunate and are born without a loving and caring family and have to adapt to a life without parents and live without their main support system. We often don’t realize how lucky we are to be living a life with the people who brought you to this world. I feel very lucky to be raised by a family who loves and cares for me very much every single day. I know that living without a family can be tough due to an personal experience. When I was just 10 years old, my cousin moved to a different city to study at a university. After living there for a while, she realized that it was too hard for her to survive without her family. She needed the love and support that a family gives so she decided to move back and go to school in the same city she was in before. After moving back, she was doing way better and was much happier to be back with her family. Looking at her, I was shown that your family can be one of the only people who can make your life better by doing the smallest things.

“The love of a family is life’s greatest blessing.” — Eva Burrows

This quote can tell us that a family is the greatest blessing an individual can have. I agree with this quote because from personal experience, I know that I can always count on my family for being there for me when I need them the most. This is the by far the greatest blessing in my life and I know that everyone can agree with this quote. Some people may not notice that their family is doing so much for them until they get put into a situation where they are no longer around their family. But, one thing you should always remember is that your family shows unconditional love for you and will always care about you.

September 16

Believe In Hope Till Your Last Breath

I believe in hope because it is what keeps you from surrendering on your knees to the difficulties of life.

This belief is, ultimately, strengthened when the eldest of two brothers completely lost hope in his life. These two brothers happened to be my cousins who I looked up to the most, and the eldest gave up all hope and took his life.

With my cousin’s hope shattered, I made the choice to hold onto hope as one of my dearest values.  His experience transformed me so that I truly believed that hope is the one to wake you up in the morning and take you through the life you dread so very much; it is hope that pushes you out of your bed in the morning, gets you through the job you hate, puts the smile on your face and tucks you back into bed at night. Ultimately, hope is the angel to your right that motivates you to keep your head held high.

From job to job my cousin bounced after dropping out of university for the women of his dreams. He could not see what he was doing to himself and his life. But when she left him, that is when he began to fall to his knees. He was broken and began suffering depression when she left him. He had no place but to go home to his mother who he had constant disputes with about his life. As any loving mother would, she took him in, a broken man who could not see the joys of life anymore. As time passed, he became stronger, getting back up from when he had fallen.The younger brother had a passion to cook and they always dreamt of owning their own restaurant together. The younger brother had gone on to culinary school in Vancouver, BC while the elder got a job as a manager at a Boston Pizza. A few years past and suddenly, the younger brother was on trial. Attempted murder. It was devastating for everyone once we learnt he was going away for eight years but the most devastated was the elder brother. All the emotions and pain from years ago started coming back. Depression became a major influence in his character, we could see him slowly changing trying to avoid everyone and everything. Things became quiet and not much would be mentioned about the younger brother. I talked to him less and less until we would only message each other on our birthdays. A year later we all got a call from their mother. My dad had picked me up from work and was quiet, knowing how hurt I would be after hearing the news. “Your cousin passed away.” Right then I started thinking about all the old times and what he must have been going through and why suddenly he had decided to commit suicide. Tears ran down my face. I could not believe that he was gone. I could not believe that it took one week till anyone found him hanging from the ceiling of his apartment.

https://www.google.ca/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=2ahUKEwjBzf2J2sDdAhWYIjQIHcfsCu8QjRx6BAgBEAU&url=http%3A%2F%2Fquotesideas.com%2Fhope-quote-with-image-hd%2F&psig=AOvVaw2AMp-9ebGIsAiZoSYVvJzu&ust=1537227785495756

This quote I have chosen simply just resonates with me and my belief with hope. My cousin faced so many problems in his life. As life progressed, his grasp on the rope of hope was held by a single thread until finally, the last of what his big heart could take, let go of that rope all together. He could not believe anymore. Hope had tried to pick him up from his feet but could never teach him how to walk again after his brother. I will always believe in hope no matter what happens as I know it will always be there to tuck me in at night.

September 16

I Believe in the Oneness that Connects Us All Together

 

https://blog.edx.org/stand-equality-justice-human-dignity

I believe in equality and justice.

I believe that God resides within each and every soul.

I believe that through meditation and prayer we can become one with God.

Above all else, I believe that there is no difference between you and I, because we belong to one source. In the life we live, people tend to see one another by their color, saying this person is brown, this person is black, or this person is white. Not understanding that we’re all internally the same, with the same blood running through our veins but different blood groups, born with the same human systems some with exceptions, but truly we all have a soul that connects us together.

Every individual was born not knowing what they’re going to face in this horrifying world we live in today. People don’t think twice before judging someone, either judging through words or through their mental thoughts. A person isn’t born with racist thoughts or feelings, their taught to have them.

I have an experience in my life where I had to deal with racism. The story goes on as, one day my sister and I were going for a bike ride in our community. There were other people nearby riding their bikes as well. A couple of people in front of us were going quite slow, so my sister and I decided to go ahead of them. While we were about three to four meters in front of them, I heard someone shout, ” Rag head!” I quickly turned my head and saw this guy laughing. I asked my sister if she heard what the man behind us said, and she said, “Hear what?” I told her that he said a racist comment about my turban. She told me, “Lets go talk to him.” As we approached the old man I said, “Excuse me did u call me a rag head?” The man replied by saying, that yes that is a rag on your head. I explained to him what the turban is meant to be, that it’s not a rag, or a hat you would pick up and put on your head. But it is great fabric that is used, that each layer is tied in the remembrance of God. I told him that this turban to me is like a crown, that is tied with great honor and respect. He greatly apologized and said thank you for informing him about the turban.

This experience really put me into perspective, of how people in society are so quick to judge or criticize one another without really realizing who the person is and where they’ve come from.

Love is the key, to eliminate racism and discrimination. I believe that if we treated one another with love and respect and did good even to the ones we didn’t really like, our world could become a better place. It’s just that small idea of seeing the same light within all and that we all belong to that one source, who resides within every living soul. Its time for us all to see each other as brothers and sisters instead of two distant strangers.

In leaving a legacy behind I want to be a positive impact for others. Be knowledge, were required to give awareness to others of who we are as individuals, as a society.  That the purpose in life is to live in harmony and peace as a collective. Not to distinguish one another by color or race, but by the qualities people have within them.

No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes naturally to the human heart than its opposite.

–  Nelson Mandela