December 3

My Identity

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Who Am I?

I believe that is a hard question to answer at my age, I feel that I have not experienced enough to truly answer that.

When are we satisfied with who we are?

A persons identity is based on factors such as life experiences, family, and religion. It can be hard to accept who you are, especially when your identity clashes with the people around you. This is something I have struggled with in my life. Growing up, I wanted to be so much like the people around me, that I changed myself until I couldn’t even recognize who I was. I built a persona in order to please those who were supposed to love me, for me. I lost sense of who I truly was, and acted like a stranger to those who knew the real me. This is the reality for kids who are growing up and trying to figure out who they truly are, and what makes them unique. Unfortunately, sometimes they abandon their divergent qualities, in order to fit in with whats “cool,” which is damaging to such impressionable minds. That is something I struggled with in middle school, the constant need to be like everyone else, being different was frightening, due to the fear of judgement and rejection from my peers. I disregarded my own feelings, in order to fit in.

“Be Yourself,” but is it really that easy? Especially in today’s society, when being different is not always valued.

Growing up, I was strangely attached to the idea of fitting in/being popular, therefore, I tried my hardest to be similar to those around me. I changed the way I looked, acted, and even thought. I was persuaded into participating in situations that I didn’t feel comfortable in. This is the result of trying to please everyone. You give and you give until there is nothing left of you anymore, and you are just a hollow shell of someone you used to be. Of course the relationships with those kind of people never last, so it is up to you to scavenge what is left of who you were. My relationships with certain people have altered my interests, goals, and and at times. my virtues. An example of this would be how, growing up, I hated sports, and was more of a “girly-girl,” but my friends, loved to play, therefore, I dedicated lot’s of time to join teams, and go to practice for something that didn’t even excite me. I believed strongly in being kind and welcoming to others, and as cliche as it sounds, “not judging books by their covers,” but when my friends asked me to behave unkindly, I could not refuse, and that is something I regret.

Now, I’ve realized that I need to live my life as who I am, and based on my rules. I have  a strong sense of identity, and that is being a positive and happy person, who spreads love, not hate, and does not judge others before knowing who they really are. You get what you give. I should not have to compromise my identity in order to be loved. If I am not being loved for who I am, then that is not love, and I will not find inner happiness.

Category: Sept 2018, Zainab | 2 Comments on My Identity
December 3

My Sense Of Identity

A person’s identity is something that is made of multiple components consisting of an individual’s dislikes, like, and beliefs which could also change over time. But we often choose to hide our identity as they represent who we are, which makes us unique from others and as a result we hide it because we want to fit in with our peers. This can be seen through my life as I had to hide my identity which I developed during my experimentation with new activities that turned into a hobby which was Airsoft.  One of reasons I hid my identity was that my mom disapproved  of this identity I developed as she hated the risks that came with it such as getting injured, or heading down the wrong path, and she would do anything to stop me from perusing it even if it is threatening me to sell my gear if I continued down this path. But that was not one of the main reasons I had hidden my identity, I hid my identity because of my peers and the constant amount of teasing and harassment I get from it, as all I wanted to was to fit in.

Throughout time, I Started to develop a stronger desire to not only open up to others, but to show people my whole identity, as just telling people the part of my identity that will help me fit in just does not feel right, because I am covering up a big portion of my identity which made me who I am, a competitive, determined, and kind individual which I developed from the Airsoft community I join. At some point, I got over the obstacle of hiding my identity, because why hide the key factor that helped me develop multiple identities in me that I never knew I had. As a result I started to actively embrace it by not only sharing the part of my identity that help me fit in with others, but also sharing the identity I hid, because from the fear that I may be rejected due to that identity being uncommon with my peers and the negative experience I had with sharing it.

And to this day I am proud of the identity I developed as an individual because the part of the identity that I hid away in the past has helped me develop identities that I never knew I had, which would help also help me in the future. Even if others do not like that part of my identity, I will not hide or change it because I am the one that gets to determine what my identity is.

 

“Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.”
― George R.R. Martin, A Game of Thrones

Category: Eddie | 1 Comment on My Sense Of Identity
December 3

Who am I?

 

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I feel like I have established a solid identity now but it hasn’t always been so. Seeking an identity was a problem for me when I was younger. Growing up, I never felt as if I needed to fit in. I always used to ride my own wave, going along with the flow. I felt amazing.

 

I started to realize a shift in middle school when I started grade five with older cousins in grade eight. I began realizing that everyone was expecting me to act a certain way; knowing I was related to my cousins. It didn’t bother me much at all at first but I slowly started to develop a fear of how people started to perceive me. Teachers, older students and even some of my own friends started to act strangely. It wasn’t till then I fully understood the situation; people were expecting me to be rowdy due to the reputation my cousins had.

I saw myself slowly change my habits and work ethics. I succumbed to societal expectations and became a new person. I began to drop certain aspects that made me unique, like my desire to learn new things or the passion I have toward my education. I began to slack around during many of my classes. I saw myself become someone I didn’t like.

I finally chose to change my habits and become myself once again in grade ten. I surprised many people as some had not seen this side of me before. I changed from a kid who would take nothing less than an “A” to a person who would laugh and get fifty percent in class. I avoided putting work into anything. I started to create this bad image which I was unable to change from all due to becoming vulnerable to people’s opinion of me. I didn’t understand the importance of being unique and being yourself. Your life isn’t based on what others think of you, it’s all about what you think about yourself.

It was a hard process to change myself back into my old habits, but I now see myself returning to my old self. I’ve noticed that I have started to redevelop old passions like astronomy.

My journey to establish my identity was not easy. Seeing myself become a pompous individual was the hardest thing I have experienced; not being able to do anything about it at first made it twice as bad. I learned that when a vulnerable individual is faced with societal expectations, they tend to succumb to the pressures imposed onto them, altering their beliefs and values.

 

 

 

 

Category: Rohit, Sept 2018 | 3 Comments on Who am I?
December 3

My Sense of Identity

My sense of identity was not solid until about grade 9 because in grade 9 I became more confident being myself and to tying to be what others wanted me to be. It became more clear in that grade because I found a friend group that I fit in with at that time an now they are the people I hang out with most. They were with me through the good and bad, and I know that I can always count on them when I need them the most. When I was in  junior high I was not very secure and I was hanging out with the wrong group of friends that would always get me in to problems and I almost got suspended for one week because of them so after that I stopped hanging out with those people. There was a point in my life where I had to reflect on who i need in my life, and who will always be there for me. I was searching for those people who I could rely on, and know that they will be there for me, in present and times, as well as in the future. I need people who I can trust, as well as friends who are loyal. There were some people who I thought that I could trust but in the end I found out that I could not trust them and they were not loyal, so I left them behind and moved on to new friends.

I had no issue with my background and I know where my parents are from. My mom is form India and my dad is from Kenya.

Image result for indian flagImage result for kenya flag

I haven’t been to ether place yet but I would love to visit both and learn more about where my parents are from and experience the way people there live and society and social life works there. I am already comfortable with my background but I would like to visit the country’s so I can become even more comfortable with my background. Now that I am in high school I am more comfortable in many aspects of my identity like my group of friends and the people who I fit in with.

Category: Aly, Sept 2018, Uncategorized | 2 Comments on My Sense of Identity
December 3

This is Me

My journey to find my identity had been quite the roller coaster. After many mistakes and many successes I still struggle in certain areas of understanding who I am. It has been this way for me since childhood. A big factor that I identify myself with is my family. Since I was a kid, my parents and grandparents have influenced a lot of characteristics within me. For example, my first language was Russian. Going into kindergarten, I had no idea how to communicate with other kids. I had troubles with school. I couldn’t read properly and had to go to special programs such as reading help. Before kindergarten, my mom enrolled me in a daycare that taught French, Spanish, English, and Russian. My mother told me that at one point I created my own language because I just combined everything into gibberish.

One of the things that impacted me forever was when my dad left. I was 5 years old and couldn’t understand why this was happening. I was innocent,, and so the understanding didn’t come to me. All I knew was he was gone. I was a very energetic kid and I had a lot of my people who did love me. I had all the love I needed.

My mom did start seeing other people, which resulted in living all over the place. It was pretty hard moving schools, houses, and friends. I was confused when I moved to different places and who all these new people were. At one point my mom and I moved in with her best friend. We had the greatest time, it was a girls night out every day. I didn’t know if I could possibly find myself one place where I knew I was home, where I just belonged.

As I got older, my mom met my stepdad. I didn’t even feel like I was lacking a male role model until my parents married. My step-dad has been there through a lot of my temper tantrums, and even though we don’t get along, he was still there. I’ve never really felt out of place until I met my stepfamily. I was very self-conscious that they were not my blood family and that I wouldn’t be accepted. As a result, I didn’t truly feel like I belonged. I felt more like an imposter.

When my brother was born, it only made me feel worse when we visited because there was this new addition to the family, he was related by blood. At times I really questioned, who am I? Do I really belong here? Over time I realized that it was all in my head. All these people that came into my life, like my cousins and aunts and uncles, they made me feel welcome, and feel like I am apart of the family.

Jumping ahead skipping a few moves and such, I started junior high at Willow Park. I was nervous and scared but it was an arts school so I was also excited. As the years went by, the school did take its toll on me. It was less of the school, but more of the people in it. I felt very a large about of pressure to try to be the “best” and have the coolest clothes and materialistic teen girl typical thoughts. As a result, I felt like I was never good enough. I kept trying to change myself to please others this caused me to feel unhappy with who I was. I felt very competitive with everyone around me, including my friends.

As I grew older, going into grade 10 it was a shock to come to Foundations For the Future Charter Academy. My school was the complete opposite of the system here. My grades fluctuated, and as a result, I stopped losing confidence in myself, and abilities.

Grade 11 it, and I really started to realize a lot of things about myself. I realized the only person holding me back was myself. I was creating problems, and I was the only one who could fix them. I knew I had all these pieces to myself, but I just ignored them for as long as possible. Once I just accepted everything for what it was, I noticed growth in myself. I noticed that some things that I cared about before, such as others opinions and judgments weren’t so relevant anymore. I loved myself or who I was and would never change anything about myself to suit others expectations. All the struggles in my life are there to teach me a lesson about who I am and help me grow. So to show this, I wrote a poem. This poem just summarizes everything that I have said before. As of right now, I know who I am, and I wouldn’t change that for anything in the world.

 

I was 3 when I started to speak in different tongue

 

I was 4 when I went to school, not knowing how to communicate

 

I was 5 when my family split

 

I was 6 living in different places

 

I was 7 when my dad came into the picture

 

I was 8 when my brother was born.

 

Going on 9 moving to a new city

 

Going on 10 finding a best friend

 

Going on 11 moving back home

 

12 new school, new school, new school

 

13 new friends, new friends, new friends

 

14 growing older, becoming lost

 

More responsibilities, more work

growing up faster than expected

new friends becoming toxic, new friends hurt

old friends lost

 

Slowly picking up my pieces

 

Entering new levels of myself

 

Finally understanding what I need to do

 

Slowly realizing to just live life, rather than survive

 

Slowly realizing that it’s not my fault, people leave

 

Slowly realizing to always surround myself with people who only build me up, not down

 

Slowly realizing that my struggles do not define me, but are a part of me

 

Slowly realizing to listen to myself,

trust myself

believe in myself

love myself

 

I was 15 when it became clear to me

I was 16 when I realized to accept people for who they are

I was 17 when I learned that playing is fun

I was now when I realized… this is me

 

Category: Masha | 3 Comments on This is Me
December 3

Struggling With My Personal Idenitity

I have always struggled when coming to terms with my identity, but it doesn’t bother me that i haven’ t found it. Throughout this journey of life I have constantly switched between different groups of friends and still am. I don’t like to associate myself with a certain group of people, I am myself and shouldn’t be characterized by the people who I hangout with. My parents have always been a strong support and a huge guidance on the right path for me. This year has already been a huge step forward on who I am becoming as a person and what I want to do in life. A huge factor has been musical and all the teachers and the community that it has created, I have found myself always enjoying the company everyone brings.  There have definitely been some defining moments in my life where I had no idea of who or even what I am, leaving me the most vulnerable and afraid I’ve been in my  life. But it’s those times that I know who is in my life and how happy they really make me, reassuring me of who I am and the importance I carry. I have yet to find my sense of identity, but am in no rush to discover it. I am more than content with the live I’m living now, and can’t wait for this journey to take me to places I have yet been in my life.

 

Middle school was a very hard time for me, especially when it came to finding a personal identity. I had no idea who I was or wanted to be and didn’t like the people I surrounded myself with. It was a time of trying everything to please everyone in my life, but ended out in nothing but a lot of pain and suffering for me. I stuck myself into a situation of trying to help everyone else before helping myself. Everyone is at that age where they have no idea what to do or think of themselves and just begin to think about those kind of questions. For me especially, it was extremely difficult to try and stay with one group of people the entire year.I was indecisive about everything, including who I wanted to hang around with. It wasn’t until grade 8 until I really started to enjoy school, and by coincidence started to talk to Tory again. As soon as I entered high school, I realized who I was becoming and the people that I wanted in my life. I started to make actions that I wanted to instead of the other way. As I reflect on the past, it has made me realized that I wouldn’t be the same person today if  it weren’t the life I lived and wouldn’t wish it went any other way. It’s super important for a person to be comfortable with themselves before they search for an identity.

 

Category: Josh, Sept 2018, Uncategorized | LEAVE A COMMENT
December 3

The quest of finding my identity

My identity has changed immensely from when I was a kid. As a child, the only influence on my identity was that of my parents; I was following my parents and was doing what they believed to be right. My identity was shaped by the knowledge they had and the morals they valued and taught me. When I was a kid, I was focused on my Punjabi identity because that’s what my parents wanted and that’s how they raised me. It was all about learning the language Punjabi and understanding and adopting the culture. When I started school, my identity started to change as I had other influences. I was becoming more “Canadian” as that’s what everyone else was. I had to adapt to the ways of Canada and how everyone acted. I started spending less time with my Punjabi identity and more time with my Canadian one. Now, I identify myself as a Canadian who has grown in a multicultural environment.

My sense of identity is challenged when it comes to my culture specifically. I thought my identity was Canadian because I’ve been here my whole life and learned everything in Canada, but that’s not the case. My parents are from India. I understand that their identity is going to be different from mine because they had a different lifestyle and way of living. I learned a lot from my parents’ background of Sikhism and am still learning some valuable lessons from that part of my history. I can see how my Canadian identity is different from my identity of being Punjabi. But I feel out of place when I find myself in a situation that causes the values from both identities to clash. This makes me feel that I am still confused about my true identity as a whole. I have my whole life and future to figure that out. I’ll always have my family and friends to help me figure out who I am going to be and what kind of person I need to be. So for now, I am a Canadian with strong roots in Punjabi culture!

Résultats de recherche d'images pour « indian and canadian flag »

Category: Rimal | 1 Comment on The quest of finding my identity
December 2

Self- Discovery

How have I struggled to come to terms with my sense of identity?

Identity.

It shapes our values and beliefs.

It’s what we represent.Related image

It’s the qualities and characteristics that make us unique.

It defines who we are.

My identity is composed of so many different elements in my life that are concrete. Yet, I still can not say that my true identity is set in stone. As my life goes on and I explore more of myself, my interests and relationships with people, I find that it’s always ever evolving. It’s hard for me to say what I am to become in the future, even if I am open- minded, and diligent in wanting to  achieve my full potential. It’s the confusion, fear, and the what if- moments that hold me back from establishing who I really am.

I think my sense of identity is most challenged by the standards set from the people who I choose to surround myself with. When I come into contact with these expectations, it makes me confused, indecisive, and just anxious. It makes it difficult to step back and say that’s not what I want. Everyone wants to give me title, a label or a definition of who they think I am, which is what makes its hard to combat this pressure to say what I really feel is me.

For most of my childhood up to as recent as grade ten, my parents have always wanted me to become a doctor. They would always tell me that, that profession is what I was always meant to be since I was young. So, for the longest time ever, I believed them and instilled that thought as I kept moving forward in my education. But coming up in to this high school, and interacting with new people who were there to tell me my options and that I was capable of achieving what I felt like I wanted to pursue and not what I’m supposed to be, helped guide me to seek beyond what I had considered my truth all these years.  As I am a very hesitant- natured person, it was challenging to embrace what I felt was my truth and for it to be accepted, because even though in the end, the final decision is mine, my family’s opinion will still and always influence me and the directions I take in life.

Finding myself is one struggle, but actually having to encounter and combat life- changing decisions, is the toughest part. The brick walls that I encounter are all pinpoints of my journey to discover my self- worth. And it will forever be ongoing until I know who I truly am.

 

Category: Sept 2018, Simran | LEAVE A COMMENT
December 2

Sense Of Identity

Identity is a term used to describe how a person naturally is. A person’s identity is who they are as a person. Their personality, looks, religion, and culture are all factors that are a part of identity. Often in life, people struggle to accept their true identity to conform to others or due to other circumstances. A situation like this also occurred in my life, in which I had to conform to the norms of society by abandoning my own identity.

A few years ago, I went to visit the country that my parents are from, for the first time. The country that I went to visit was Pakistan. I was 14 years old at the time and had no clue how the people in Pakistan were. When I got there, instantly I noticed that everyone dressed, acted, and moved differently than Canadians. Right away, I started feeling like I didn’t belong there because of my Canadian identity. All of my cousins that I would hang out with would be asking me questions about why I was acting so strange. I was supposed to stay for 4-5 months longer and realized soon that I would not feel comfortable being that odd person out. So I decided to abandon my Canadian identity and to start acting like everyone that lived in Pakistan. I started dressing and acting like all my cousins. Not only that, I even stopped speaking English and began speaking Urdu all the time. I also began wearing the traditional clothes that most Pakistani’s wore all the time. Pretty much, I accustomed my self with the Pakistani culture as much as I could. In just about a month of me being there, I had changed my personality completely. My parents noticed this immediately and then they asked me why I was acting differently. I responded by saying that I am just trying to become a more Pakistani. After living there for a few more months, I came back to Canda. With me, I brought this completely different person.  My friends at school noticed that I was behaving much differently than before. I was acting like a Pakistani person and had also picked up a strong accent. They all asked me how Pakistan was and what happened there. That is when I realized, that I didn’t need that Pakistani identity anymore. It took me a while to gain back the Canadian identity that I lost in Pakistan. Just so that I could conform to society, I was able to abandon my own identity so that I could be considered, “Normal.”

“We live in a world full of people who are satisfied with pretending to be someone they are not.”

Tommy Tran

This quote is portraying a similar message to my personal anecdote. Individuals are so obsessed in this world with artificial things such as fame, reputation, and conformity to society that they would abandon their own identity. Just like the quote explains, they would pretend to be someone they are not. What they fail to realize is that true identity is what matters most. These are just some of the common struggles that individuals go through with their own identities. Struggles like these happen every day to everyone. Through my experiences and this quote, I have learned that people have a natural want to feel accepted and will even ditch their own identity to achieve this.

 

Category: Hassan, Sept 2018 | 5 Comments on Sense Of Identity
December 2

My Sense of Identity

https://telanganatoday.com/pakistan-afghanistan-hold-talks-uk

What is my sense of identity?

A persons identity is something that evolves over time. As children we see our identity in a simple manner, as we grow we see our identity and associate it with other people, places and things that are more sophisticated. Having stuggles with your identity can cause conflicts with the perspective of who we are.

Something that I have been struggling with in terms to my sense of identiy is the division between my parents and their cultures. My mom is from Pakistan and my dad is from Afghanistan, so both of my values come from similar yet different places. The division of these cultures are really cinfusing. I believe that I understand the similarities and diffrences but the conflict comes when I don’t know how to equally associate myself to both Afghani and Pakistani cultures. Somewhere I find myself struggling in who I am and how I am not as close to my moms culture. My mom and dad being two different cultures has had an impact on me. I believe that I am close to my dads culture and bving this struggle of not being able to be associated closely to my moms culture sometimes scares me because I feel that I am doing enough for me to fully understand and apply my Pakistani culture to my life. I also feel bad becuase having a mulitcultured family has alloeing Afghani because I feel I understand it more and also because I feel that my values and beliefs are more tied into being Afghani.

Hawed for many opportunities, and knowing that I am not associat about the person I am. ing myself to my moms culture makes me feel bad

Something I am doing that is helping me get over this struggle is that people that are Pakistani in my life. Having these relationships has allowed me to look deeper into the culture and also has opened up my views and beliefs about the Pakistani culture. Another thing I am doing is asking my mom about some of the stories she has about Pakistan and about the culture and traditions they do. This has helped me to see more into the Pakistani culture and also come closer to my mom. Which can be weird to say but for me is alot because I have always been called and associated with my dad more than my mom and I think that it is a factor to why I am more closer to my dads culture than my moms.

As individuals we all have stuggles that are tied into the topic of having a sense of identity. We would not be considered human if we did not stuggle to come to terms wth our identity. Sometimes people have it easier and find who they are faster than others, and sometimes it may take a lifetime to figure out whoe we realy are

“DONT LET YOUR STURGGLE BECOME YOUR IDENTITY “

Category: Rukhsana, Sept 2018 | 2 Comments on My Sense of Identity